Monday, August 1, 2011

Ramadan

Ramadan comes again.. Muslims around the world prepares for the fasting month, ramadan has special meaning for everyone in thier own individual way. What is fasting month? In my younger days, i remember a lively debate in australia about fasting, as i was told by my late grandmother, fasting month is about controling our desires.. Not only eating or drinking but being humane, humble and kind. We are encouraged to embrace each other weakness and ypromote the goodness of others.



For me ramadan is a special time as in the past, it was always that the lost boyz would gather at my house for the 1st day of fasting, Zaki and izzany would buy or in Zaki's case cook to bring it over to share. Ramadan would see us trying to support each other in keeping our fast intact. How i miss those days with them. I could tell so many stories..



Now days as a single father, my day starts as usua almost pike tradition, Kierra and me goes on our usual food buying which most often than not ends up buying like we have a family of 10. Adik is still too young to start joining us so as last year, this year father&daughter heads to jalan stadium to buy food. Isnt it wonderful.. Times of this that memories of those gone would haunt me, and i doubleup my doa and zikir as at least this month i do double for its only a month... Then i think of those that has walked away from my life, once called friend or lover, i would foolishly try and make contact just to see how they are doing but when rebuff by not answering or picking up, the pain kinda rebleeds, well only myaelf to blame there but i often wonder, how arrogant and proud they are thinking that they will leave forever and so above the rest of mortals in this world, that they forget of god'grace and how that we are only here by his will, i feel afraid because they could never value what they have. But i worry too much, my dad always said u can take a horse to water but u cant force it to drink. If to them they are happy and contented in being that way, god speed and god bless, only god knows right?


Returning to the present, we are home and my mom is again laughing about the wastage of food that kierra&i bought hahahah.. I slowly whisper a prayer that my mom will be with me forever, with me being single without a future wife in sight, i worry the day she goes away and i have to face this world truly alone, just with my kids ... I pray by then life would have given me support and someone to care for all 3 of us but even if its just us, we will still prevail and survive.



In all, life is about accepting and qppriciting what god has given us, good or bad. Human error for we are only humans, its the hipocrit and liar that i cant stand but god is great.. And ramadan is that special time to remind us all. To forgive to be a better person than the next for it all truth, we are but all the servant of God. Have a great buka puasa folks.
Peace


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Location:Jalan Purnama,Alor Setar,Malaysia